action come before thinking? regret? but it was too late... a scar will never recover, just like a broken class never join back.

nowadays, i have really busy with assignment and works. mountain of assignment and stress of working and times. mountain of assignment and the exam is just around the corner have causing me changes become more aggressive. added 1st time working has result multiple changes of my emotion and reaction. i began to lose myself. all my feeling and emotion changes around the environment and feeling and emotion have take over my mind, causing me done lot of mistake without realizes it. my house mate angry with me, my friend turn over me and i become hatred. is that what i want? i never have the time to think about it and just now only i realizes it was really my fault this time. i play card try to relax, but lose money and still giving those "good" face to my house mate. the most worst is dare i scold my house mate in front of my female friend and he still respect me and think on my position, i never think that i shall not do so, everyone have their own pride. i have knew it for so long, but why do i let my emotion and feeling take over me and forget about it? it really hurts deep to my house mate, i feel so guilty. it was my bad!!!
sorry to my housemate and friend, i am really not to mean so. i will not avoid the responsible of what i have done, it was really my fault. sorry once again and for thousand of time, it was really my mistake. i do not know how to make you all forgive me, because of my stupid and idiot behavior. thanks for my housemate scold me and bring me back, darkness really make people lose themself. if you not scold me, i might still think that i was right forever, but it was not. however, i am really sorry for what i have done. i know that our friendship is important to you, but i always abuse it and take it easy. sorry is seems to be too late. i have no right to ask for anyone to forgive me since long ago, but deep inside my heart, you will be always my best freind. hope you all will forgive my behavior and tell me whenever and whatever i do wrong. SORRY...