I am crazy

wake up in 7 a.m, and i prepare to go college. but my first lecture start at 10? haha... i play maple first till then Boon Hua call me at 9.20 a.m then he fetch me to college. anyways, in lecture hall i am was excited at first, but then i turn up to sleep at half of my lecturer lecturing something we learned before? ok, it was quite good for morning class, but for the next class is my public relation lecture which held at petaling campus and it is 3 hours and 30 minute from the time i done with my lecture. it was suffering when the weather so hot and end up with some accident that the one suppose to lecturing us for public relation lecture absent and we wait innocently for 30 minute. what a "good" starting for my second sem.

都说处女座另类，双重性格，甚至有点神经质，其实原因只有一个，处女座的一切都要随自己外显的性格而转，姑且称之为'状态'。处女座状态好的时候，可以将自己聪明、细腻、能干、温情、幽默、有内涵等优良品质完全外展，此时他们显得如此完美，光芒四射，并且可以表现得 非常外向、健谈，容易与人打成一片（这本非他们的性格）。而一旦处女座状态不好，便会变成另一个人，甚至非常窝囊，一事无成，不过通常此时他们都躲避外在的干扰,所以让人感觉有点间歇性自闭症) 因为同为水星守护，所以处女和双子一样善变，但双子善变的是心思，处女善变的却是情绪。很多时候处女座要面对很多实际的琐事，这时的处女座便不得不在冷中面对周围世界：要么说话做事很不自然，有做作的痕迹；要么便极度冷 漠和被动，对谁都不理不睬。其实处女座很清楚自己现在的样子，但他们无力改变和控制自己的情绪，只能选择疯狂地逃避一切。他们想的是：与其很不自然地面对你，尴尬地和你说些无关痛痒地话，或是因和平时反差太大而被人说成表里不一，性格怪异，还不如先躲一 阵子，等调节好了以后再出来。所以，在与人交往中，他们只会和不得不交流的人（实在躲不掉）或是完全陌生的人（反正无所谓）交谈，而和熟悉的朋友反而疏远。 所以.你在他心中地位越重，他躲得你越远。特别是恋人. 而且,大家都知道处女座的人有严重的完美主义倾向,所以就有了所谓的“处女座的人最喜欢若即若离”。原因很简单：他只想给你一个最好 最完美的自己，而不愿让你看到他无助脆弱的一面。所以请记住，有时处女座对你冷，绝不是你说错做错什么，这是他们正常的生理现象，他们只是不想让严寒和冰霜伤害了你（可事实上这种做法已经伤害）。不必难过，因为他们在乎你的话，他们的内心比你还要难过、自责和内疚！他们所能做的，只希望快点调整好情绪，回到你的身边。 正基于以上两点，处女座有时便会表现出非常另类的行为和思维模式。 他们的性格也很多来源于此：不喜主动，不善交际（也可以热情，只是 今天热了，终有一天会冷的），不爱表现，不喜抛头露面（万一哪天情绪无法把握状态不好时，岂不大失脸面），诸如此类。 关于'洁癖'并非处女都有洁癖，很多处女座并不爱干净，但却要求整洁，他们更多的是井然有序，不喜欢别人破坏他们所整理和布置的'完美' 格局。处女座更多的是有精神洁癖。一旦触碰到他们精神上的禁区，严重时会...

3 days already, my house internet access get blocked because noone going to pay the last 5 month internet fees? that is not my responsible, suppose is another housemate of mine to pay it. however, within these few day i am really suffering a lot. and one more problem that made me hatred is my roomate, i do not know how to comment about him. he is really annoying and childish everytimes, he is so troublesome, irresponsible and so on. whenever talk to him, i am also lazy to having such a stupid conversation with him. sometimes it is so hard to communicate with some people, because of their self-centered, selfish, irresponsible behavior. is that possible because i have some really good friend? everything happening around us seems to interrelated with many different and complicated ways by balancing each other at the same time. perfection is so hard, and it is almost impossible if as what the assumption said, perfection is impossible in these world which seek for balance. there are good pe...

early in the morning, rain heavily but it did not stop my desire to go Petaling street with my SSTQ geng. (haha... funny but nice~) at first, Boon hua come and fetch me to carefour to park his car and we take ktm to kl sentral and then we walk around kl sentral to search something for buy. Boon huua have brought a pefume, then we wait Queenie and Hui san to reach. after that, we take monorail to petaling street and i have find out a lot of interesting stuff, unfortunately i do not have enough money to buy all, but i have learned a lot at there. there are a lot of different kind of people with different behaviour, it was really nice when observing their behavior. then we heading to sungai wang, i behave like the fly which lost the direction but luckily got "gps" (Hui san) then we reach safely. when on the way going home, i just remember that we have left something at petaling street, all is my fault because i suppose to remember it before we heading to sungai wang. ( a bit sa...

friday, i back to my hometown, Bentong. the first time i back after 3 month? homesick? it is a good question that a lot of my friend asking me when talk about Bentong. i going home not to cure or recover from whatever that call homesick, i am going home is just to make sure my parents still in good condition and to let them have a look of how i am was changing. i am not actually those kind of emo person (sometimes) at the moment never expect me to behave childish to say that i miss my home or whatever that is the way i am. i wish someday they will be someone to understand me. the last word from me, "it is really hard to pretend someone other than yourself"

with Queenie, Boon hua and Hui san go sunway and watch movie in afternoon. we then going Queenie's house to park Boon hua car and play with Queenie's "cute" car, me and Boon hua enjoy a lot with that car. [haha, when i driving i speed up till Boon hua tears out] then Queenie fetch us go kajang to eat satay. it was the first time i eat Kajang's satay, it really nice.

wow, today was really my lucky day. i go sing K with my friend, it was really nice, and special for me? anyway, this was not the first time but it was really nice because only me, Queenie, Boon Hua and Hui San [the first time Neways provided each mic for all of us, but it keep no batery...=.=]. we all having a lot of fun, take a lot of picture also. after that we going to have a walk at Subang Lake [take picture again... >u

Finally final exam is finished!!! This time is the first time that i feel not happy after exam, do not know what reason. When all this happened i am feel like nothing to do and lost. I knew it was mean that i seems like live to exam, to be honestly i admit the other personality is live for this purpose. Sometimes i am not even know what should i do. During the exam period as in exam week, i spend most of the time at Boon Hua house, i revise, revise and revise. Life seems so meaningless for me. However, within this period, i have think about how to earn lot of money. It started when i jogging with Boon Hua around his housing area, and i found out that all the people live at that Kota Kemuning Hills is so rich. They are richer than what i have imagined, i wondering how to become like them, how i only able to be same standard with them? Another me is so desperate to become like them and can be do anything just to be like them.